How to make a hard decision without any hard feelings

How to make a hard decision without any hard feelings

At the end of 2018, I have decided to leave my job. I said goodbye the company where I believed I will work for decades. It was obvious for me, that change is crucial, but I was frightened before I made this decision. In my mind, I was frightened about my responsibilities. Taking care of my wife, our 2 little daughters (2 years and 4 years at this time), was a huge load on my shoulders.

In this post I want to summarize how I decided to give up everything, reboot my life and had no bad feeling about this choice (even I do not know if my future is going to be better or worse than my present. Well basically I know it will be better, because it is just up to me.)

 

Know your goals and situation

If you do not have a life plan, I recommend you to prepare one. I have started to plan my life a few years ago. My goals and plan draw me a path, where I am heading, and what I want to achieve. If your situation is not supporting your goals, it is time to think a little bit.

Well, 2018 way not ideal for me. So it was not hard to make a decision that I need a change. The only question was, what kind of change.

 

Prepare for the change

I believe in God. I know he has a plan with me, and I am actively working on my goals to make God’s goals. The only problem, that sometimes I do not know what is His plan with me. But I know, he wants me a good father, a beloving husband, a reliable and successful partner and somebody who takes care of his family and community.

So when I felt, that I need a change, I started to actively pray and keep fast. I decided I will not eat any meat until I will not have any decision regarding my future.
With this fast and thinking about changes I started to see opportunities, and I find time to think about the changes. What should I change, how should I change, and a lot more thing come into my mind. I started to resonate with the idea, that in the near future something will happen.

 

Open for the opportunities

I do not know why, but God has closed a lot of doors for me and opened a lot of others. It turned out, that It is better for me if I change the company where I work. So I started to apply for job advertisements, and accept HR headhunter’s requests. I had interviews with IT companies in Switzerland, and I already imagined myself working there. But as it turned out, God had another plan with me. Long story short, my future job found me. The country’s biggest bank has found me and proposed a job opportunity. I had gone through the whole hiring process in 1 month, which is unbelievably fast for a multinational company like this. The job is unbelievable. Working for a huge bank, as a Business Analyst, doing the same what I have done in the past 3 years, and it is a huge opportunity for me to grow professionally. On the other hand, I have a family, and all changes impact them a lot.

 

Have a decision and stick to it

No surprise, I have accepted the job, and I am going to work in my dream job in a few weeks. But making this decision was hard. Pros and cons were hundreds. And it was not only my decision. And I am glad I have such a great family. My wife was my biggest fan and opposition. We set down together and had a lot of discussions. We have gone through on a lot of question, and it was a key for me. It seems to me, that we have discussed everything which came into my mind and into her mind.

But what is important, as soon as we made a decision, it was done. No more question, no more discussion about the changes. Sure we are talking about our future, but it has been decided, where are we going, and how 2019 will look like for us. No regrets, no “what would happen if…” questions, etc. The decision has been made, we live according to this.

 

+1 celebrate

It may seem obvious or ridiculous but celebrating this whole process, decision, change seems important to me. Sometimes you know, if you are facing a “life-changing moment”. Sometimes you do not. But whatever happens, if you celebrate that, this event emphasize your choice. Celebration makes it memorable. With my wife, we went out and spend a day alone, without the kids, have a great dinner together, which is huge for us, because it has not happened for ages before this. So whenever we drive by the restaurant where we ate, it always makes us remember what has happened.

Thanks for reading my story. Basically, I wanted to summarize what has happened to me, and how I make any hard decision. This process has worked for me in the past, and I believe it will work this time also. We will see. I will update this post in a year.

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